what am i doing here?

i love holidays! :)

and by that, i mean i love weekdays that our government declares as days that we actually don't have to show up for work! haha!!

hamm.. i long for the day when i wake up in the morning and finding myself excited to go to work.. i wonder if that day would ever come... i mean, it's not that i am not thankful for the job that i have, because i am. i surely, 100%, totally am.

in fact, i love working. i love going somewhere (the office?) and doing something, that in the end of the day, i would get a feeling that i have accomplished something. i love feeling that i have been able to be of help to someone. i actually don't mind being at the office (physically) for a whole day, i don't even mind staying behind and logging in some overtime, if that meant i will be spending my time working. no, i don't mind working. but i have to know that i am being effectively and efficiently spending my hours at work. i don't want to be going to the office at 8:00am just to sit there and busy myself rearranging the paperworks on my table to the nth time. I want to go to the office with a purpose.

i know you could be thinking, "well, of course you have to do something, that's your job!"

wrong. yes, i have a job. unfortunately for me, i don't know what the job description is. i don't know what my exact duties are. i have been at this particular office for a year now, and still, i am waiting for orders and instructions before i can move. i want to know how things work in this office. i want to be in the middle of the process. working the process. but i cant. why? the only answer that i can give you is, "i don't know what the process is."

you see, i work as a finance personnel at a public high school. and at this public high school, there's only two finance personnel - the bookkeeper, and the disbursing officer, me. during my one year stay, i have only learnt how to make a disbursement voucher and its attachments, how to write a check (which i already knew), how to encode the amount for the payroll, and how to bring the checks to the payees and making sure they are signed.

i am not complaining here (okay, maybe i am). all i want to be is efficient. i don't want to waste my time knowing that i could be doing something useful had i known what to do and how to do it. i have asked for the bookkeeper to teach me some of the things that she do, because truthfully, she always complains that she has too many reports to do, too many deadlines to meet, and yet here i am, doing nothing. but she doesn't teach me... she doesn't want to share the knowledge, or maybe just doesn't want to share the workload.

is there a possibility that our government would let new hires undergo a training or some sort before they are allowed to work?

this may be the reason why so many of our government agencies are so low in productivity - majority of its workforce doesn't even know what the heck they should be doing. so more often than not, they are not functioning for what they're supposed to be for, only following their direct supervisor's order. even our teachers don't know what they're doing! c'mon, 70% of our public school teachers don't even know how to compute their students' grades using the K+12 format!!

hmmm... i don't even know why i'm ranting about that... bottomline is, shouldn't government new hires be given a training on what their supposed-to-be role is in the betterment of our government?